Saturday, February 21, 2009
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Real Fucked Up ways to die...
Everybody's got to die. Some would say it doesn't matter how you die, but there's still some pretty f*cked-up ways to go.
1. Being eaten by a Hyena.
They say a Hyena will eat you while you're still alive, it'll tear your skin off and eat your innards while your're still awake and screaming. Would you feel it if your intestines were being chewed on? Getting air or blood in your abdominal cavity is very painful, what about when it's your own faeces in there? Maybe they don't really do that, but it'd sure be a bad way to die.
2. Drowning in a tar pit.
Viscous, filthy tar fills your lungs and mouth, you can taste it; it's burning your eyes and you can hardly move because it's so thick. There'd be no way out, you couldn't tread tar or swim to solid ground. If you got your head above the surface, you wouldn't be able to breathe, because you'd have the equivalent of a hundred-thousand cigarettes down your trachea. You'd pass out after a few minutes, but those would be some terrible minutes.
3.Suicide.
The death itself might not be so bad (depending on your method of choice), but how horrible would a situation have to be to drive someone to suicide? The anticipation would be palpable, as you write your suicide note and prepare to throw your life away.
4. Immolation.
How long 'till you'd die, or at least pass out? Would it be when the flames start cooking your brain? You wouldn't be able to breathe because the fire would be using all of the oxygen, but that'd be the least of your concerns. Even if someone managed to put out the fire, you'd have months (maybe years) of skin grafts and terrible pain to look forward to. Or you would quite likely acquire an infection and die then instead.
5. Being left in a room with no way out and all the water you can drink.
Survival manuals say you can survive up to three weeks without food, but only three days without water. So now you aren't afforded the privilege of a relatively quick death, you must sit around and starve for three weeks with nothing to do and no hope whatsoever.
6. The Iron Maiden.
A seriously f*cked-up medieval invention, 'nuff said.
7. Bleeding to death on the operating table before anaesthetics were invented.
Remember those old cartoon pirates with a peg leg? They had their legs sawn off while they were conscious and without painkillers, after which the remaining stub of their leg was dipped in hot tar. What if you bled to death in the process, as I'm sure a lot of them did? That's a bad way to die, slowly slipping out of consciousness (which I'm sure you wouldn't object to) while all you can feel is pain. "I can't feel my toes!"; that's because they're on the bench next to you, Blackbeard.
8. Impaled by a garden ornament.
This one's not so much bad, but just f*cked up. My mum knew a woman who died this way, she fainted while gardening and fell onto a particularly sharp gnome. Imagine the shock of the person who finds the body, with a garden gnome's hat sticking out of their chest, a trowel still in their now-stiff hand? That's f*cked up.
9. Being eaten alive by ants.
Imagine a whole army of the little things crawling all over you and into every orifice they can find; they'd be going up your nose, into your ears, down your throat and behind your eyeballs. Perhaps you've been paralysed by some evil henchmen, perhaps you've been buried up to your neck by some evil henchmen, who can know such things? Whatever the cause, how could you fight back against a thousand tiny ants?
10. Chewed up by a woodchipper.
How many people have been killed by these ridiculously dangerous things? It'd chew up your legs and abdomen, you'd see your muscles and bones being ground and chopped into a slurry beneath you. Maybe the chewier bits of you would clog the machine, so at best you'd be left with ragged stumps for legs. If your arm got caught first, though, your head would be pulled in rather quickly... Not nice.
1. Being eaten by a Hyena.
They say a Hyena will eat you while you're still alive, it'll tear your skin off and eat your innards while your're still awake and screaming. Would you feel it if your intestines were being chewed on? Getting air or blood in your abdominal cavity is very painful, what about when it's your own faeces in there? Maybe they don't really do that, but it'd sure be a bad way to die.
2. Drowning in a tar pit.
Viscous, filthy tar fills your lungs and mouth, you can taste it; it's burning your eyes and you can hardly move because it's so thick. There'd be no way out, you couldn't tread tar or swim to solid ground. If you got your head above the surface, you wouldn't be able to breathe, because you'd have the equivalent of a hundred-thousand cigarettes down your trachea. You'd pass out after a few minutes, but those would be some terrible minutes.
3.Suicide.
The death itself might not be so bad (depending on your method of choice), but how horrible would a situation have to be to drive someone to suicide? The anticipation would be palpable, as you write your suicide note and prepare to throw your life away.
4. Immolation.
How long 'till you'd die, or at least pass out? Would it be when the flames start cooking your brain? You wouldn't be able to breathe because the fire would be using all of the oxygen, but that'd be the least of your concerns. Even if someone managed to put out the fire, you'd have months (maybe years) of skin grafts and terrible pain to look forward to. Or you would quite likely acquire an infection and die then instead.
5. Being left in a room with no way out and all the water you can drink.
Survival manuals say you can survive up to three weeks without food, but only three days without water. So now you aren't afforded the privilege of a relatively quick death, you must sit around and starve for three weeks with nothing to do and no hope whatsoever.
6. The Iron Maiden.
A seriously f*cked-up medieval invention, 'nuff said.
7. Bleeding to death on the operating table before anaesthetics were invented.
Remember those old cartoon pirates with a peg leg? They had their legs sawn off while they were conscious and without painkillers, after which the remaining stub of their leg was dipped in hot tar. What if you bled to death in the process, as I'm sure a lot of them did? That's a bad way to die, slowly slipping out of consciousness (which I'm sure you wouldn't object to) while all you can feel is pain. "I can't feel my toes!"; that's because they're on the bench next to you, Blackbeard.
8. Impaled by a garden ornament.
This one's not so much bad, but just f*cked up. My mum knew a woman who died this way, she fainted while gardening and fell onto a particularly sharp gnome. Imagine the shock of the person who finds the body, with a garden gnome's hat sticking out of their chest, a trowel still in their now-stiff hand? That's f*cked up.
9. Being eaten alive by ants.
Imagine a whole army of the little things crawling all over you and into every orifice they can find; they'd be going up your nose, into your ears, down your throat and behind your eyeballs. Perhaps you've been paralysed by some evil henchmen, perhaps you've been buried up to your neck by some evil henchmen, who can know such things? Whatever the cause, how could you fight back against a thousand tiny ants?
10. Chewed up by a woodchipper.
How many people have been killed by these ridiculously dangerous things? It'd chew up your legs and abdomen, you'd see your muscles and bones being ground and chopped into a slurry beneath you. Maybe the chewier bits of you would clog the machine, so at best you'd be left with ragged stumps for legs. If your arm got caught first, though, your head would be pulled in rather quickly... Not nice.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
What celebs will look like if they weren't celebs
Ever wondered how celebs look like if they were not celebs? Now you know :)
Olsen Twins
Michael Douglas & Catherine Zeta Jones
Pamela Anderson
J.Lo & Marc Anthony
Britney "Trailer Trash" Spears
"Daddy" Beckham & "Poor" Spice
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
10 People with Unbelievable Medical Conditions
The Woman Who has 200 Orgasms every day
UK's Sarah Carmen, 24, is a 200-a-day orgasm girl who gets good, good, GOOD vibrations from almost anything. She suffers from Permanent Sexual Arousal Syndrome (PSAS), which increases blood flow to the sex organs. "Sometimes I have so much sex to try to calm myself down I get bored of it. And men I sleep with don't seem to make as much effort because I climax so easily."
She believes her condition was brought on by the pills. "Within a few weeks I just began to get more and more aroused more and more of the time and I just kept having endless orgasms. It started off in bed where sex sessions would last for hours and my boyfriend would be stunned at how many times I would orgasm. Then it would happen after sex. I'd be thinking about what we'd done in bed and I'd start feeling a bit flushed, then I'd become aroused and climax. In six months I was having 150 orgasms a day—and it has been as many as 200."
She and her boyfriend split— and new partners struggle to keep up with her sex demands. "Often, I'll want to wear myself out by having as many orgasms as I can so they stop and I can get some peace," she said.
The Man Who Can't Get Fat
Mr Perry, 59, can eat whatever he likes - including unlimited pies, burgers and desserts - and never get fat. He cannot put on weight because of a condition called lipodystrophy that makes his body rapidly burn fat. He used to be a chubby child, but at age 12 the fat dropped off "almost over night". He initially tried to eat more to gain weight, but it had no effect. Mr Perry, of Ilford in Essex, endured a decade of tests before the illness was diagnosed. It finally emerged that his body produces six times the normal level of insulin. Doctors have admitted that the condition would be a "slimmer's dream".
The Man Who Doesn't Feel Cold
Dutchman Wim Hof, also known as the Iceman, is the man that swam under ice, and stood in bins filled with ice. He climbed the Mt. Blanc in shorts in the icy cold, harvested world records and always stands for new challenges. Scientists can't really explain it, but the 48-year-old Dutchman is able to withstand, and even thrive, in temperatures that could be fatal to the average person.
The Boy Who Couldn’t Sleep: stayed awake 24 hours a day for years
Rhett Lamb is often cranky like any other 3-year-old toddler, but there’s one thing that makes him completely different: he has a rare medical condition in which he can’t sleep a wink. Rhett is awake nearly 24 hours a day, and his condition has baffled his parents and doctors for years. They took clock shifts watching his every sleep-deprived mood to determine what ailed the young boy. After a number of conflicting opinions, Shannon and David Lamb finally learned what was wrong with their child: Doctors diagnosed Rhett with an extremely rare condition called chiari malformation. "The brain literally is squeezed into the spinal column. What happens is you get compression, squeezing, strangulating of the brain stem, which has all the vital functions that control sleep, speech, our cranial nerves, our circulatory system, even our breathing system," Savard said.
The Girl Who is Allergic to Water
Teenager Ashleigh Morris can't go swimming, soak in a hot bath or enjoy a shower after a stressful day's work - she's allergic to water. Even sweating brings the 19-year-old out in a painful rash. Ashleigh, from Melbourne, Australia, is allergic to water of any temperature, a condition she's lived with since she was 14. She suffers from an extremely rare skin disorder called Aquagenic Urticaria - so unusual that only a handful of cases are documented worldwide.
The Woman Who Can’t Forget
That's the story of AJ, an extraordinary 40-year-old married woman who remembers everything. McGaugh and fellow UCI researchers Larry Cahill and Elizabeth Parker have been studying the extraordinary case of a person who has "nonstop, uncontrollable and automatic" memory of her personal history and countless public events. If you randomly pick a date from the past 25 years and ask her about it, she’ll usually provide elaborate, verifiable details about what happened to her that day and if there were any significant news events on topics that interested her. She usually also recalls what day of the week it was and what the weather was like. The 40-year-old woman, who was given the code name AJ to protect her privacy, is so unusual that UCI coined a name for her condition in a recent issue of the journal Neurocase: hyperthymestic syndrome.
The Girl Who Eats Only Tic Tacs
Meet Natalie Cooper, a 17-year-old teenager who has a mystery illness that makes her sick every time she eats anything. Well, almost anything. She can eat one thing that doesn’t make her sick: Tic tac mint! For reasons that doctors are unable to explain, Tic tacs are the only thing she can stomach, meaning she has to get the rest of her sustenance from a specially formulated feed through a tube.
The Musician Who Can't Stop Hiccupping
Chris Sands, 24, from Lincoln, hiccups as often as every two seconds - and sometimes even when he is asleep. He has tried a variety of cures, including hypnosis and yoga, but nothing has worked. Mr Sands thinks his problem stems from an acid reflux condition caused by a damaged valve in his stomach. "If the acid levels are severe enough they are going to do keyhole surgery and grab part of my stomach and wrap it around the valve to tighten it," he said. Mr Sands, who is a backing singer in the group Ebullient, said the condition has hampered his career as he has only been able to perform four times. In the next couple of weeks --as of the day of the report--, doctors at Nottingham's Queen's Medical Centre will put a tube into his stomach to monitor acid levels and decide if keyhole surgery is possible.
The Girl That Collapses Every Time She Laughs
Kay Underwood, 20, has cataplexy, which means that almost any sort of strong emotion triggers a dramatic weakening of her muscles. Exhilaration, anger, fear, surprise, awe and even embarrassment can also cause sufferers to suddenly collapse on the spot. Kay, of Barrow-upon-Soar, Leicestershire (UK), who was diagnosed with the condition five years ago, once collapsed more than 40 times in a single day. She said: "People find it very odd when it happens, and it isn't always easy to cope with strangers' reactions. " Like most cataplexy sufferers, Ms Underwood is also battling narcolepsy - a condition that makes her drop off to sleep without warning. Narcolepsy affects around 30,000 people in the UK and about 70 per cent of them also have cataplexy.
The Woman Who is Allergic to Modern Technology
For most people talking on a mobile phone, cooking dinner in the microwave or driving in a car is simply part of modern living in 21st century Britain. But completing any such tasks is impossible for Debbie Bird - because she is allergic to Cell Phones and Microwaves. The 39-year-old is so sensitive to the electromagnetic field (emf) or 'smog' created by computers, mobile phones, microwave ovens and even some cars, that she develops a painful skin rash and her eyelids swell to three times their size if she goes near them. As a consequence, Mrs Bird, a health spa manager, has transformed her home into an EMF-free zone to try and stay healthy. 'I can no longer do things that I used to take for granted,' Mrs Bird said. "My day-to-day life has been seriously affected by EMF".
Source : http://www.oddee.com/item_96473.aspx
UK's Sarah Carmen, 24, is a 200-a-day orgasm girl who gets good, good, GOOD vibrations from almost anything. She suffers from Permanent Sexual Arousal Syndrome (PSAS), which increases blood flow to the sex organs. "Sometimes I have so much sex to try to calm myself down I get bored of it. And men I sleep with don't seem to make as much effort because I climax so easily."
She believes her condition was brought on by the pills. "Within a few weeks I just began to get more and more aroused more and more of the time and I just kept having endless orgasms. It started off in bed where sex sessions would last for hours and my boyfriend would be stunned at how many times I would orgasm. Then it would happen after sex. I'd be thinking about what we'd done in bed and I'd start feeling a bit flushed, then I'd become aroused and climax. In six months I was having 150 orgasms a day—and it has been as many as 200."
She and her boyfriend split— and new partners struggle to keep up with her sex demands. "Often, I'll want to wear myself out by having as many orgasms as I can so they stop and I can get some peace," she said.
The Man Who Can't Get Fat
Mr Perry, 59, can eat whatever he likes - including unlimited pies, burgers and desserts - and never get fat. He cannot put on weight because of a condition called lipodystrophy that makes his body rapidly burn fat. He used to be a chubby child, but at age 12 the fat dropped off "almost over night". He initially tried to eat more to gain weight, but it had no effect. Mr Perry, of Ilford in Essex, endured a decade of tests before the illness was diagnosed. It finally emerged that his body produces six times the normal level of insulin. Doctors have admitted that the condition would be a "slimmer's dream".
The Man Who Doesn't Feel Cold
Dutchman Wim Hof, also known as the Iceman, is the man that swam under ice, and stood in bins filled with ice. He climbed the Mt. Blanc in shorts in the icy cold, harvested world records and always stands for new challenges. Scientists can't really explain it, but the 48-year-old Dutchman is able to withstand, and even thrive, in temperatures that could be fatal to the average person.
The Boy Who Couldn’t Sleep: stayed awake 24 hours a day for years
Rhett Lamb is often cranky like any other 3-year-old toddler, but there’s one thing that makes him completely different: he has a rare medical condition in which he can’t sleep a wink. Rhett is awake nearly 24 hours a day, and his condition has baffled his parents and doctors for years. They took clock shifts watching his every sleep-deprived mood to determine what ailed the young boy. After a number of conflicting opinions, Shannon and David Lamb finally learned what was wrong with their child: Doctors diagnosed Rhett with an extremely rare condition called chiari malformation. "The brain literally is squeezed into the spinal column. What happens is you get compression, squeezing, strangulating of the brain stem, which has all the vital functions that control sleep, speech, our cranial nerves, our circulatory system, even our breathing system," Savard said.
The Girl Who is Allergic to Water
Teenager Ashleigh Morris can't go swimming, soak in a hot bath or enjoy a shower after a stressful day's work - she's allergic to water. Even sweating brings the 19-year-old out in a painful rash. Ashleigh, from Melbourne, Australia, is allergic to water of any temperature, a condition she's lived with since she was 14. She suffers from an extremely rare skin disorder called Aquagenic Urticaria - so unusual that only a handful of cases are documented worldwide.
The Woman Who Can’t Forget
That's the story of AJ, an extraordinary 40-year-old married woman who remembers everything. McGaugh and fellow UCI researchers Larry Cahill and Elizabeth Parker have been studying the extraordinary case of a person who has "nonstop, uncontrollable and automatic" memory of her personal history and countless public events. If you randomly pick a date from the past 25 years and ask her about it, she’ll usually provide elaborate, verifiable details about what happened to her that day and if there were any significant news events on topics that interested her. She usually also recalls what day of the week it was and what the weather was like. The 40-year-old woman, who was given the code name AJ to protect her privacy, is so unusual that UCI coined a name for her condition in a recent issue of the journal Neurocase: hyperthymestic syndrome.
The Girl Who Eats Only Tic Tacs
Meet Natalie Cooper, a 17-year-old teenager who has a mystery illness that makes her sick every time she eats anything. Well, almost anything. She can eat one thing that doesn’t make her sick: Tic tac mint! For reasons that doctors are unable to explain, Tic tacs are the only thing she can stomach, meaning she has to get the rest of her sustenance from a specially formulated feed through a tube.
The Musician Who Can't Stop Hiccupping
Chris Sands, 24, from Lincoln, hiccups as often as every two seconds - and sometimes even when he is asleep. He has tried a variety of cures, including hypnosis and yoga, but nothing has worked. Mr Sands thinks his problem stems from an acid reflux condition caused by a damaged valve in his stomach. "If the acid levels are severe enough they are going to do keyhole surgery and grab part of my stomach and wrap it around the valve to tighten it," he said. Mr Sands, who is a backing singer in the group Ebullient, said the condition has hampered his career as he has only been able to perform four times. In the next couple of weeks --as of the day of the report--, doctors at Nottingham's Queen's Medical Centre will put a tube into his stomach to monitor acid levels and decide if keyhole surgery is possible.
The Girl That Collapses Every Time She Laughs
Kay Underwood, 20, has cataplexy, which means that almost any sort of strong emotion triggers a dramatic weakening of her muscles. Exhilaration, anger, fear, surprise, awe and even embarrassment can also cause sufferers to suddenly collapse on the spot. Kay, of Barrow-upon-Soar, Leicestershire (UK), who was diagnosed with the condition five years ago, once collapsed more than 40 times in a single day. She said: "People find it very odd when it happens, and it isn't always easy to cope with strangers' reactions. " Like most cataplexy sufferers, Ms Underwood is also battling narcolepsy - a condition that makes her drop off to sleep without warning. Narcolepsy affects around 30,000 people in the UK and about 70 per cent of them also have cataplexy.
The Woman Who is Allergic to Modern Technology
For most people talking on a mobile phone, cooking dinner in the microwave or driving in a car is simply part of modern living in 21st century Britain. But completing any such tasks is impossible for Debbie Bird - because she is allergic to Cell Phones and Microwaves. The 39-year-old is so sensitive to the electromagnetic field (emf) or 'smog' created by computers, mobile phones, microwave ovens and even some cars, that she develops a painful skin rash and her eyelids swell to three times their size if she goes near them. As a consequence, Mrs Bird, a health spa manager, has transformed her home into an EMF-free zone to try and stay healthy. 'I can no longer do things that I used to take for granted,' Mrs Bird said. "My day-to-day life has been seriously affected by EMF".
Source : http://www.oddee.com/item_96473.aspx
Monday, November 10, 2008
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Simple joke :)
There were two nuns..
One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM),
and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).
It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the
past thirty-eight and a half minutes?
I wonder what he wants.
SL : It's logical. He wants to rape us.
SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the
most! What can we do?
SL : The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.
SM: It's not working.
SL : Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical
thing. He started to walk faster, too.
SM: So, what shall we do?
At this rate he will reach us in one minute.
SL : The only logical thing we can do is split.
You go that way and I'll go this way.
He cannot follow us both.
So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.
Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried
about what has happened to Sister Logical................
Then Sister Logical arrives.
SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here!
Tell me what happened!
SL : The only logical thing happened.
The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me.
SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?
SL : The only logical thing happened.
I started to run as fast as I could and he started to
run as fast as he could.
SM: And?
SL : The only logical thing happened. He reached me.
SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?
SL : The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.
SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?
SL : The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.
SM: Oh, no! What happened then?
SL : Isn't it logical, Sister?
A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man
with his pants down.
One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM),
and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).
It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the
past thirty-eight and a half minutes?
I wonder what he wants.
SL : It's logical. He wants to rape us.
SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the
most! What can we do?
SL : The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.
SM: It's not working.
SL : Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical
thing. He started to walk faster, too.
SM: So, what shall we do?
At this rate he will reach us in one minute.
SL : The only logical thing we can do is split.
You go that way and I'll go this way.
He cannot follow us both.
So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.
Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried
about what has happened to Sister Logical................
Then Sister Logical arrives.
SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here!
Tell me what happened!
SL : The only logical thing happened.
The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me.
SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?
SL : The only logical thing happened.
I started to run as fast as I could and he started to
run as fast as he could.
SM: And?
SL : The only logical thing happened. He reached me.
SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?
SL : The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.
SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?
SL : The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.
SM: Oh, no! What happened then?
SL : Isn't it logical, Sister?
A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man
with his pants down.
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